Narcissism, Or The Seed Of Aggression In Children

You rarely hear a mother or father admit to their children physically or verbally abusing them.

It is a taboo subject; the face of violence remains in the shadows, far from the public light, and hides behind the proverb “we wash our dirty laundry with the family”.

A sentence which, generally, sums up the violence, the lack of self-esteem, or even the absence of educational remedies of the parents themselves as well as a growing narcissism among the children.

However, studies conducted on this subject reveal a devastating reality.

The conclusions are clear: violence by children towards their parents is increasingly frequent, intense, and precocious.

But where does this upsurge in teenage violence against their own parents come from?

A study among Spanish adolescents consisted of analyzing the factors that favor the appearance of this type of domestic violence.

The elements collected and the subsequent analysis show that exposure to violence within the home, lack of communication and permissive education make teenagers narcissistic who physically or verbally attack their parents.

The seed of violence germinates in the home

Researchers tell us that most adolescents who assault their parents were themselves abused by them when they were young.

It seems then that exposure to violence within the family itself is one of the decisive elements validating this remedy as a good educational tool.

However, on other occasions, it is the lack of affective and positive communication between parents and children and / or the lack of quality time devoted to children that triggers violent attitudes.

A permissive attitude on the part of parents to set no limits can also be hidden behind violent reactions from young people.

The results show that exposure to violence in the first year of the study coincided with assaults directed at parents in the third year.

Likewise, a distant relationship between parents and children in the first year of the study was linked to a narcissistic attitude in adolescents during the second year, as well as assaults on parents.

Family education, the key to preventing narcissism and violence

According to researchers, teaching practices and education are the key to preventing adolescent narcissism and violent attitudes.

If parents do not educate their children with a sense of responsibility and respect, probably when faced with the lack of a better model, they will acquire the model of today’s society, one where frustration or imperfection does not exist. do not exist.

Each teenager must then do everything to escape them as best he can.

However, the behavior that fathers and mothers instill in their children is not the only explanation; the temperament of children is another important component.

Some children are more impulsive than others and deal with violent behavior more easily, since it is an easy way out of the annoyances that parents or life itself can cause.

Uncontrolled hatred, or the antechamber of adolescent violence

Narcissistic teens tend to feel frustrated and rejected.

When this happens, first come the screams and insults, accompanied, before, during or after, by physical aggression.

The researchers explain that, for this reason, when parents perceive that their child exceeds the limits that they themselves have set for him and that he becomes disrespectful, they must establish an educational dialogue, sanctioning, restorative, and which cuts the violent behavior at the root.

According to the researchers, the age group between 13 and 15 years is critical for the positioning of the adolescent, or pre-adolescent, in the face of aggression, whether directed towards parents, others, or objects. .

On the other hand, the researchers also emphasize the fact that, even if the manifestation of this aggressiveness is not explained by gender issues, we do observe a rather marked development in girls.

Once the aggressive behavior has arisen in adolescents, the treatment considered should go towards reducing the narcissism.

For this reason, the team suggests that the solution lies in education based on respect and tolerance in the face of frustration, as well as non-exposure of children to violence.