If You Don’t Set Limits, You Won’t Receive A “thank You ” Or “forgiveness “
Don’t set limits on your suffering. Stretch it until it seems to unfold down an entire avenue and then come back towards you with a powerful “boomerang” effect. To suffocate you, to make you feel guilty, to immobilize you. Don’t set limits on the people around you. Be a good husband, a model employee.
Stretch your patience until you cannot take it any longer for we have always been taught that sacrifice is united with virtue, even if it means putting aside our life and our desires. You can choose this option. Don’t set limits, but you should know that you will never get a “thank you” or “I’m sorry” for it. People will get so used to seeing you playing a role that they won’t even think you deserve their respect for everything you do, for the meaning of your own struggle.
The direct consequence of putting up with things that hurt you, crooked words, beatings, abuse and neglect is none other than becoming the perfect prey of the urban savannah, the perfect bait for everyone. -s the predators.
The price to pay for not setting limits
No one blames you for suffering any kind of abuse or for going through an irreversible psychic metamorphosis if you couldn’t count on the help you needed when you needed it. There are people who have suffered so much that they think they can only serve as a punching bag.
You have to think that, at least, if you cannot find on your own the strength to move forward, you can always offer the last force of your breath, the rage behind your sighs or the last effort of climbing a step to help another up the stairs.
No one blames you for reaching that level of emotional need, that feeling that every spark of magic and creativity deep inside has been swallowed up by circumstances. On the other hand, if you still have sufficient lucidity to realize that you are in this state, you may still be able to take a step back and put the brakes on certain situations.
You may still have the opportunity not to end relationships with an ax, but to eliminate them at the source with a sharp silk thread, like “Hindu hair removal”. Almost imperceptible and infallible.
You may be at that wonderful point on the path where you know no one is going to come and save you, and you don’t have to either. You still have time to do what is called “an express cure” of everything around you. A social detox, rich in vitamins and free from oxidizing human additives.
The importance of “getting psyched up” for some people
There is no shortage of psychopaths in this world. Unfortunately, they are sometimes extremely difficult to recognize. Some are just little shadows with some evil characteristics. And, unjustly, people who have character and who refuse to be silent in the face of injustice are sometimes treated even worse than the former.
This is why the price to pay for not knowing how to set limits is very high. It increases even more when we refuse to see the reality that lies before our eyes. When we do not know how to detect offenses and / or respond to them in time. The smell of your fear of abandonment, criticism or stigmatization becomes the best ally of those who do not hesitate to place your weakness as armor in front of them to cushion the blows.
There are so many types of people, so much complexity in human relationships that it would be impossible to know why some work one way and some don’t. If everything were to be done according to an established scenario or a divine plan, nothing would make sense and life would lose its interest.
However, some relationship patterns seem to be repeating themselves. We observe them, we fight them, we suffer from them. These are the ones that are characterized by a communication system where some people cannot make their voices heard. Models of relationships in which some do not set limits on what they give, even if that means being unhappy.
Relationships where a person denies the right to be able to think of himself first. The price to pay for not setting limits on requests, opinions that we did not seek to know and bad behavior is that you will never see the slightest gesture of courtesy.
Don’t expect a “forgiveness” or a “thank you” from someone who has long passed the limits of emotional abuse with you. These words of politeness and gratitude will be intended for someone who, perhaps even doing nothing, has already won the “first dowry” of all praise.
Maybe it’s time to get your skin back, to “psych yourself up” a bit until you are the first person on the list of your plans and the first on the list of people to make happy. You can still surprise enormously, put an end to your patience, turn the other cheek but without receiving a slap and engrave your limits and limitations in steel. Never expect a “forgiveness” or a “thank you” from someone who allowed you to kneel down to keep them standing and their heads held high. This person doesn’t deserve it.
